The Great Wall in Heals & a Skirt 3/20/11

Woke up, swam, ate a ton at breakfast then headed with the group to the Great Wall. Along the way we made a stop at the Jade Museum so all the foreigners could spend their money. It was painful but we pulled through (and apparently Chinglish isn’t derogatory as the tour guide used it several times). We arrived at the Great Wall and waited outside the bus for the group. These Chinese ladies were laughing at us so Andy stood beside them, started stretching, and made them really uncomfortable. That shut them up. Apparently we’re amusing to the locals because “we have large noses”- no shit, first time I’ve heard that one. The Great Wall was amazing. I was prepared to meet up with our friend afterwards so I wore clothes that were not optimal for climbing steep stairs. We had an hour so Andy and I decided to go the steep route since it was less busy. Damn those stairs were steep. There I was, American girl, high heel boots and a skirt. So many people were talking shit, but I passed them all. The pollution was so bad even an hour from Beijing that we had to take all our pictures in the Pop Art setting so the pics didn’t look black and white. The climb was awesome, the decent was very difficult. I used the railing and did my best lady-like-climb-down-each-1.5-feet-stair move. We had some more pictures with the locals, Andy ate some meat on a stick then we were off.

Next was a stop at the Bird’s Nest and Ice Cube at the setting of the 2008 Olympics. It was cool to see, amazing architecture. Then we hit up the silk market (which sold everything). We had so much fun. Andy received two death threats from the sales girls. When you get death threats you know you got a good deal. He starts off charming them then goes in for the kill. One chick told him she was going to chop off his head after he bought a North Face backpack for $15. One gal told him he had hairy arms like a gorilla then continued to pull it from her amazement. She told him hair is difficult to keep clean- dirty hairy white boy. We walked past another sales girl and she said “you need underwear”. “I don’t wear underwear” Andy exclaimed. Word travels fast as another girl in another row of shops saw Andy walk by. “You don’t wear underwear!” she pointed a laughed. Silly white American. We were exhausted from the 100 degree temperature and constant arguing so we went with the group for a shitty Peking duck dinner. We have to get away from the group if we have any chance for good food. We saw an Ikea here, Walmart also broke the Chinese market.